Sexual Engagement Within A Melbourne Licensed Venue

1. Hierarchy of Locations:

Office > Disabled Toilet > Toilet > Kitchen > Bar Floor

2. Form level if with:

Spouse/Partner/Significant Other = Bad Form
Known for few hours = Okay Form
Random Stranger = Good Form
First Date = Great Form

3. Action for future relationship if with:

Spouse/Partner/Significant Other = Continue as normal
Known for few hours = Meet same next night/week
Random Stranger = Call back late at night
First Date = Run away/do not look in eye

4. If loss of undergarment/clothes during engagement:

Leave them there = “I shall cut my losses.”
Call and ask if there = “I might come in, but I’m not saying my name.”
Go in next week to collect = “I’m embarrassed, but slightly proud.”
Go in next night to collect = “Another Friday night and I can’t afford to lose my jeans again.”